The last month has been difficult for me as I struggle to come to terms with yet another birthday. However I realised that I’m changing or maybe things around me are changing. It finally dawned on me that I was creating the pressure, something I didn’t really need to do. I’m so proud of what I have achieved I’ve worked hard and learnt a lot this year. I just don’t mean the renovating the unit I also mean emotionally, physically and mentally.
It’s taken me a long time but I can finally say eating and exercise has become automatic part of my life I no longer have to think about it. I still have one of those days where I gorge on chocolate but I no longer feel guilty about it. I just dust it off and remind myself I don’t need to eat my feelings even if the rum n raisin chocolate tastes bloody divine.
I remind myself on a daily basis that I don’t need to surround myself with negativity as it brings me down. I sometimes have a high expectation of people that are in my life which can sometimes be my downfall. But realistically the only person that can cause my downfall is me.
So I might be another year older but I’m not to concern. Its funny it was my team and of course Jodes, Farls and Shari that reminded me that I was about to embark on another adventure I just needed to embrace it. And they were right I have embraced that I’m another year older. And I’ll continue to remind myself to have a little bit of faith as everything happens for a reason.
I’ve done a lot of soul searching over the last few years and I can finally say that I have felt at peace for a very long time. The sensation of pure happiness with no doubt in myself is a breathtaking feeling and I won’t allow anyone to take that away from me.
Hence until my next birthday I’m going to just breathe and see where my next escapade takes me.